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Plan the wedding, but keep the romance

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July 20, 2011 | 1,691 views | Post a comment

By Beverly Clark

Ideally, the time between getting engaged and saying “I do” should be one of the most romantic and love-inspiring periods of your life. However, in real life, it’s usually filled with a good dose of stress and a smattering of lovers’ spats - or shall we say, disagreements - that can throw cold water on the hottest passion. It’s a challenge, but it’s not impossible to keep the romance from sputtering out during this crazy, wonderful, hectic and unparalleled time in both your lives. Here are some suggestions to keep those passion fires burning:

•Write it down. Commit to writing your intended a note, email, text message - whatever - that reiterates why you’re going through all this stress in the first place: you love each other and want to spend the rest of your lives together. If you keep that thought above all others, you’ll be golden.

•Keep your date nights. Once a week, just go out (or stay in!) and do something fun together, whether it’s playing a board game, making s’mores by the fire, giving each other massages, or having dinner at your favorite local place. It’s a chance to touch base and just be a couple, instead of a couple who’s getting married.

• At least once a month, tell each other something you don’t know about each other. It will bring you closer together and may even help you write your vows.

• Take a class together. It should be fun to attend, and the homework should be fun, too. It could be related to your wedding - dance lessons come to mind - or could be completely unrelated, like how to speak a foreign language or bake a soufflé.

•Take up a hobby together. Rock climbing, painting, art gallery visiting - whatever you like.

•Start exercising together. Never underestimate the power of a long walk or run - or even a good game of tennis - to rev up the romance in a relationship, no matter how old it is.

•Take turns cooking a meal for each other. Doesn’t have to be dinner - could be breakfast in bed, or a picnic on the beach. Make it a surprise and you get extra points.

•Spend at least five minutes of every conversation with each other talking about something other than the wedding. Enough said.

•Read a book together. That is, one reads to the other, then vice versa. This can be very romantic when done in front of a fire, with wine or chocolates involved. Or not.

The premise of keeping the romance alive is simple - find new ways to connect with each other. These are skills that will not only help you now, before the wedding, but throughout your life together as a happily married couple.

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