Saturday, October 25, 2014
1012 C Street  •  Floresville, TX 78114  •  Phone: 830-216-4519  •  Fax: 830-393-3219  • 

Lost & Found

If you are missing a pet in Floresville, be sure to check the Floresville holding facility. Animals are only kept for 3 days. Contact Las Lomas K-9 Rescue, 830-581-8041.
Lost: Diamond set in gold mounting prongs, fell off my wife's wedding ring, in Floresville, reward offered. 210-867-1319.
FOUND - Heifer on East Lupon Rd in St. Hedwig. Must Identify. Contact (210) 296-1988 - 10/22/14
More Lost & Found ads ›

Help Wanted

Water Clerk. The City of Elmendorf  has an opening for a fulltime Water Clerk. Preferred candidates should have good organizational skills and perform routine clerical duties, need to possess good communication skills in dealing with the general public. Duties include receptionist functions, water department billing, processing payments and reconciling daily receipts.  Starting pay is $13.50 per hour. High School diploma or equivalent and drug screening is required. Computer experience, cashier experience and bilingual ability is a plus. Applications can be picked up at the administrative offices located at 8304 FM 327 in Elmendorf. This institution is an equal opportunity provider, and employer. 210-278-3682.
Maverick Grill is hiring waitstaff, kitchen manager, cashier, and line cook. Apply in person at 6671 U.S. Hwy. 181 N., Floresville, between 2-5 p.m. Monday-Saturday.
More Help Wanted ads ›

Featured Videos





Video Vault ›
TNMCRE/MAX homeRichardson Chevrolet home

Movie Reviews


The Three Musketeers


The Three Musketeers


E-Mail this Story to a Friend
Print this Story
Neil Pond
November 9, 2011
1589 views
Post a comment

Starring Milla Jovovich, Logan Lerman, Matthew Macfadyen & Ray Stevenson. Directed by Paul W.S. Anderson

PG-13, 110 min.



What do Mickey Mouse, Charlie Sheen, Gene Kelly, and Barbie have in common?

They’ve all been featured in movies based on “The Three Muskeeteers,” Alexandre Dumas’ enduring 1844 yarn of “one for all, all for one” French swordsmen on an international mission requiring both heroism and heart. A rousing tale that resonates throughout the ages, it’s been adapted into more than 30 different film versions over the past 100 years.

And, well, here’s the latest one.

This new cinematic riff keeps the novel’s 17th century setting and premise but juices up the requisite swordplay with a ridiculous sideline about flying warship dirigibles, which eventually end up as a warships-kabob impaled on a cathedral spire.

“I hate air travel!” notes one character, puking into the clouds.

That line is but one example of the movie’s feeble stabs at what passes for humor in the clunky, overly contrived script delivered by mostly unfamiliar, mostly European actors with British accents scampering around in fluffy “period” costumes on enormous, palatial sets and reacting to all sorts of computer-generated mayhem.

Moviegoers will spot a couple of familiar faces. Oscar winner Cristoph Waltz is the duplicitous Cardinal Richelieu, and former model Milla Jovovich plays Milady de Winter, a double-crossing superspy with a few tricks up her flounced petticoat.

Jovovich looks voluptuous in a torso-squeezing bustier, and director Paul W.S. Anderson (also her husband, how about that!) creates more than one opportunity for her to jiggle in slow-mo, cartoonishly acrobatic espionage sequences. Seeing the way Milady outfoxes and outmaneuvers all sorts of booby-traps, you can only surmise her character must have access to a Renaissance invention that somehow plays “Matrix,” “Mission: Impossible” and “Kill Bill” DVDs.

The rest of the actors seem to have been cast for their resemblance to other, better-known stars who all had the good sense to steer clear. One bears a passing resemblance to Robert Downey Jr. Another favors Dewayne “The Rock” Johnson, if Rock was a bit smaller and sported a bejeweled eye patch.

And over there--that guy could pass for Orlando Bloom in a poofy pompadour wig as the power-hungry Duke of Buckingham. Wait a minute... that IS Orlando Bloom in a poofy pompadour wig as the power-hungry Duke of Buckingham! How’d he end up here? Maybe he was jonesing for some “Pirates of the Caribbean” action after deciding to exit that successful franchise before the fourth movie set sail.

Bloom, and the rest of the actors, however, should have remained dry-docked instead of shipping out on this big, bloated Three Muske-mess, which, unfortunately, is primed for a sequel next year.

All for one, one for all---but no second helping for me, thanks.
 


Your Opinions and Comments
Be the first to comment on this story!

You must be logged in to post comments:



Other Movie Reviews
DDS Dentures & Dental Services Right-side banner
Southern Electric & Lighting right
Liberty Gun Show
Carrie Moy
Sherwood Surveying
Hoelschers home
Pursch Motors
Sara Canady Political ad
Russell Wilson political
John D. Foster home
Paul Pfeil political ad
Caraway Ford
Michelle Tackitt election
Abrego Lake
Floresville EDC
WCN border security forum 10/3/14
Pat Brown Realtors, Inc. home
Voncille Bielefeld homeDrama KidsWilson's Auto ChooserHeavenly Touch homeBlue Moon Karaoke & DJChester WilsonSacred Heart SchoolAllstate & McBride RealtyTriple R DC Experts

  Copyright © 2007-2014 Wilson County News. All rights reserved. Web development by Drewa Designs.